Everyone loves SPAM....right??!

No not the mystery meat SPAM, I mean all the funny, crazy and creative emails we all get on a daily basis, SPAM.... Some of you may get enough SPAM to cause acid reflux disease so you know what this can be like! Today I checked out lots of these emails I got all because they love me and want to give this crazy monkey free, cool stuff...

Here's some of my favorite SPAMS from today:

- u-Scoot: Your Scooter Store
- sweet mm Cutie expect truck detail?
- Lose Weight with ColonAid and Green Tea
- Ped egg - Now you can have clean smooth feet
- Permanently engrave anything you own!
- We are giving away HDTV's!
- Learn to live in dating harmony!
- INHERITANCE REMINDER
- Dumbo
- Account Notice: Payment due
- Your eBay listing for Mickey Mouse is confirmed!

Ok the last few are legit, and someone called me "Dumbo", but the rest seem ok?! I can't wait to get my cool engraved tattoo on my inflated self, then watch some HDTV before I ride my u-scooter over for my harmonious date with a sweet cutie...that's after I collect my inheritance and make my feet smooth and clean of course. It's a good day to be a crazy monkey!

Well, I'm jus' grindin man, so ya'll nevermind me!

PS: Good news is if you look up SPAM on Google, the #1 listing is for that mystery meat stuff!

Crazy Monkey Answers Fan Mail

Hey friends! While I was surfing some of my favorite internet sites the other day..I got this very interesting message from a male fan that I'd like to share.... Let's take a look (I've taken out names and identifying info so the person won't get stalkers)...

Hi,

This is G.
I am on a dating site (----------.com screen name m------8) and although I have been on dates, I have not found that special someone yet. I have a 4 day 3 night vacation that I won to go to Cozumel, Mexico. I have not set the date yet but it will most likely be May 16 to the 26th.

I decided to find an attractive, fun, romantic, intelligent single female to go on a sun filled, relaxing, romantic, getaway there. I hope that this email may land in a mailbox of that woman or might get passed on to a friend of yours that would become that person. If you are interested email me back here so I can get to know you a little.

You can also see my personal profile on --------.com so that you can learn a little about me.

Talk to you soon,

G

...and here's my response to the fan:

Dear G,

Well first off this crazy monkey was really flattered by your fan mail and especially the offer to go to the very exciting land of Mexico! I know that I'm attractive, fun, romantic and intelligent enough to qualify for the trip... But then upon reading the message's fine print it said you wanted a female. :( That rules this monkey out, but as you can see in the image above my distant crazy monkey cousin Melinda just might be the one! (she's the one with the pink bow on)

G, I hope you find the right woman for your excursion, but please keep my inflated cousin in mind when making your selection..she's quite the party animal and would love to party it up in Mexico! Throw me a few bananas and I'll put in a good word for ya! ;)

Your main monkey,

Crazy Inflated Monkey